According to licensed couples therapist Ian Kerner, most couples need therapy long before they think they need it. It’s common for couples to get disconnected from each other and feel like their intimacy needs are not being met.
Thus, some people decide to go the wrong way in their marriage and develop problems, such as the start of an affair, or harboring resentment, instead of openly communicating the issues in the relationship and trying to resolve them. So, when infidelity becomes the main topic in couples counseling, the underlying issues are often dismissed.
Many signs point out that something is wrong with your relationship. So, instead of blaming the partner, you can start couples therapy and see where you’re in the relationship.
Here are some signs showing whether you need to start couples counseling.
Lack of Communication
When there’s a lack of communication in the relationship is often a warning sign that there’s an issue with your relationship. If you feel like your partner is tuning out or ignoring your needs, it’s time to ask for professional help.
Many problems stem from how we communicate or we don’t do with our partners, so it’s important to let them know when something is bothering us or causing discomfort. The relationship therapists NYC offers the best services in the area and wider, so feel free to schedule a consultation or book a therapy session.
Furthermore, if you often find yourselves stuck on the same issue and bring it up every time you fight, we’re sorry to break it to you, but it’s time to book a session as soon as possible. If you are consistently bringing up the same issue, it means you haven’t healed up completely and there’s something that still hurts you or provokes negative feelings.
You Become Easily Annoyed
Many people in a relationship start noticing they are annoyed with each other once they start living together or have been together for so long. They often tend to start feeling resentful toward their partner and even the little things can grind their gears.
If you are continuously annoyed by your partner, you’re probably in need of assistance. Or if you find the small habits they once did were cute and sweet, but now are stupid, annoying, and cringe, it’s time to question your emotions and find the root of why you are feeling that way.
Social Media Might Be An Issue
Since the majority of the world is obsessed with social media and have incorporated it into our daily lives, it’s only logical to think that it might be an issue in a relationship. While for some couples social media is not an issue, for others is a more painful subject. When one person doesn’t approve of how the other one is using their social media channels, it can be a big deal-breaker in the relationship.
For example, your girlfriend might be jealous of you having your ex-girlfriends as friends on Facebook, or if you like the posts of hot girls on Instagram. And you seem fine with doing that. So, see what’s the issue. If both of you aren’t on the same page, it’s time to share your thoughts, discuss boundaries or go to couples counseling.
Lack of Trust
Trust in the relationship can be broken for many reasons. Maybe one of the partners was unfaithful, and now you’re trying to restore the level of trust and return to your old selves. But, it’s kind of difficult to do that when the trust is damaged and broken.
Thus, many couples opt for couples therapy, mainly to deal with the hardships in the relationship and see whether they can save what’s left of the trust.
Lack of Intimacy
If you are missing intimacy in your relationship, or one of the partners starts losing interest, it can lead to an endless distance from each other. Intimacy requires safety and trust to be yourself and aware of your feelings. To get your relationship to the deepest levels of intimacy you need to share authentic expressions of your feelings, and honor your partner’s as well.
If you are invalidating his/her feelings, and not even trying to share yours, it’s time to ask for help.
You Are Fighting All The Time, or You Are Never Fighting
When you are constantly fighting or not fighting at all imposes a threat to your relationship. It’s better to share a couple of arguments and have a healthy fight instead of shutting yourselves down completely. If you never fight or fight all the time, it’s a cause for concern. Talk to a licensed professional and take care of your relationship!
Book A Session Now!
It’s time to book a couples therapy session if you’ve checked all of the warning signs above. It’s better to ask for help ahead of time than to bury the relationship problems and issues and act as if nothing happens.
To learn more about the benefits of couples counseling, check the rest of our blog.